How to Jumpstart Your Libido with Sensual Massage

There are many massage styles available, but one you won’t typically see on a professional massage therapist’s menu is sensual massage. I don’t recommend asking for one either, this isn’t a menu hack like you see on TikTok for Starbucks — that’s a good way to be asked to leave whatever spa you’re attending. If you want to hire a professional for a massage with a happy ending, I recommend you hire an escort.

Sensual massage can help release built up tension and stress within the body which increase the receivers well-being. They do not necessarily have the end goal to orgasm or ejaculate but can cause people to focus on the pleasurable sensations during the experience. 

This type of massage can bring couples closer together as you explore each other’s bodies. Massages can also relieve pain from health issues, help release tension, relieve your daily anxieties, assist in relaxing someone for sleep and soothe headache pain.

Sensual massage is one of the most luxurious forms of foreplay there is. Getting ready to have sex — whatever “sex” to you means, whether that’s fingering, oral or penetration, doesn’t just involve making out like you’re 16 again. You can use sensual massage to connect physically and emotionally and jumpstart your libido.

Why Give a Sensual Massage?

Most of our everyday communication is non-verbal and body language plays a huge part in how we understand other people. It makes sense that massage, one of the most intimate kinds of touch, is a good way of communicating with your lover. Each caress, stroke and rub can be used to say anything from ‘I adore your body’ to ‘I hope you had a good day at work’.

So while massage is obviously great because it loosens tension and relieves physical pain, it can also help unblock their mind — as they focus less on the pain and the stress associated with it. Whether you decide to give their whole body some attention, or just their hands or back, here’s what you’ll need to prepare.

Setting the Mood For Jumpstarting Your Libido With Sensual Massage

You don’t need a lot of space to give a massage in, as long as the place you do have is nice and relaxed (and comfy). Whether you’re planning to massage your partner in your bedroom or living room, as long as you get the atmosphere down, you’re good to go. 

To help set the mood, start by making the room warm. As your partner’s probably going to be naked (or at least semi-naked), you want to ensure the environment is as comfortable as possible. Dim the lights or light some candles, harsh lighting can be an uncomfortable distraction during massage, so bring in a little bit of romance with some fairy lights or candles. Do a sound check before the fun begins. This would include turning off cell phones. Some people may find the quiet sounds of a babbling brook or rain relaxing, but others may find them a tad too cheesy. Ambient music or soothing R&B may be a better choice, as long as you play something that you both find appealing. Whatever you decide on, like the lighting, you want the noise level to be soft and low.

What massage lotion or massage oil should you use?

One of the most important parts of your sensual massage is a slippery oil or lotion that will let your hands glide across your lover’s body, and leave their skin feeling smooth and nourished. Working on your partner’s body with massage oils and lotions specifically formulated for an erotic connection is helpful. Wicked Sensual Care has an entire line of massage oils and creams specifically formulated to feel fantastic on your skin, smell delicious, and that are formulated with spa quality ingredients

Of course, if your massage leads to sex there’s other protection you may want to consider. The main thing to remember is that massage oils can break down latex condoms and other barriers, so if you know you’ll be utilizing any of these later, either use a silicone lube for massage oil such as Ultra Silicone or Ultra Silicone Heat, or make sure you have non-latex barriers on hand that will not be damaged by oils.

How to Give a Sensual Massage

Regardless of which body part you’re going to be massaging, there are techniques that can be used almost anywhere. Be careful not to press too hard, or cause any pain when you’re giving the massage. Take time to check in with your partner to find out which parts they enjoy most. The first few touches you make should be long, lingering and purposeful. Psychologically speaking, firm contact will reassure your partner and make them feel safe (think of how a strong handshake makes an impression on a business partner).

1. Apply the massage oil/lotion. I recommend starting with one of Wicked Sensual Care’s intimate massage oils such as the lavender and rosemary.  This will not only get their skin warmed up, it also brings our sense of scent into play. Your hands should be flat but your fingers should be relaxed, allowing them to splay, and follow the natural contours of your partner’s body.

2. You might be tempted to start off massaging intensely and deeply, but the opposite can be more exciting and arousing. Try using your fingertips, and trace the contours of your partner’s body. Run your fingers through their hair, gently grazing their neck with the pads of your fingers or follow the smooth curves of their lips with your thumbs. This soft touching will give great results and allow you to move your touch from one area of the body to another fluidly.
3. Pressing, kneading and rolling the thumbs against the body is a great way to work-out tension in the muscles. This is also a great time to re-apply your lubricant and when I would recommend switching to a sensual massage lotion. The orange blossom and patchouli is a personal favorite of mine.
4. Press your thumbs against any body part and smoothly move them away from you, using the full extension of your thumbs. Moving each thumb, one after the other creates a continuous rolling sensation that will really get rid of knots and tight spots. This works especially well on the back, shoulders, feet and thighs.
5. People can be particular about their feet, so be sure to ask before moving to massage them.
6. You should always work towards the heart when giving any type of massage. When working on legs and thighs, for example, your strokes should move upward. Be careful behind the knee cap. There’s a nerve here (the popliteal nerve) that is very sensitive and should never receive deep pressure.
7. Don’t forget your partner’s face. It’s unlikely they’ve had a facial massage (unless she’s lucky enough to visit an aesthetician!) So gentle strokes here, while maintaining some eye contact can be truly erotic. Typically, no oil is necessary for facial massage.

While nothing we’ve discussed has been inherently sexual in nature, just the simple act of touching our partners can jumpstart our libidos. If your partner is up for it, you can incorporate clitoral massage using Wicked Sensual Care’s Awaken clitoral stimulating gel, or just a touch of silicone lubricant. You don’t need any special equipment or even product to massage the more intimate parts of your lover’s body.

Being present, touching, tasting, and paying attention to what our lover’s body wants and needs is truly all any of us needs to jumpstart our libido most days. However, if we can give and receive a fantastic sensual massage in the process, why not?

written by Demeter Delune